Tuesday, October 12, 2010

Taebo Hoe

A few weeks back i went to a fairytale themed party as Ghetto Snow White in my Converse All Stars and long white dress [for lack of a better outfit]. Tragedy struck me blind when my size 32 dress wouldn't zip! Granted my breasteses have grown but not so drastically, it was then that i noticed the appendaged fat on the side preventing the poor zip from reaching it's desired destination. My flatmate had to zip me up and i am both pained and embarrassed to say a little skin got caught and screams were heard in the next room.
By no stretch of the imagination am i a fitness freak but i'm blessed with good genes and a fast metabolism ergo I've never really had to worry about it. However i'm a proud foodie, which means most things deemed for human consumption i will at one point consume [if they happen to be good,at many points]. So to combat inevitable obesity [because anyone who knows me knows not to even suggest dieting and portion control] i decided to get back on the old TAEBO and let Billy Blanks whip me into shape.


I made this decision on Sunday night, i was so excited i tossed and turned till the wee hours of the morning [like a child going on a holiday to a exciting destination, in my case destination get-back-in-your-dress]. The burning ring around my eyes, lack of fresh bottled water and lack of proper space didn't deter me [a premonition of my size 40 ass buying two seats at the airline counter kept me going].
Fortunately the basic workout lasts 28 minutes and 23 seconds [a minute longer and i would've died], there i was sweating like a Tijuana whore [one of the many reasons gym was not an option,i have a thing about sweating en masse, more to the point, being seen sweating]. I found myself competing with a ripped geriatric of no less than 60 in a two piece gold bra and tights [eeuw i know] i soon found to no avail as she breezed by the roundhouse kicks and double squats that i instantly gave up on. When Billy Blanks said that's all for today folks, i could've kissed him! The exhilaration i felt at planning to do something and seeing it through, getting back my health and shape was worth it...until today.
It's Tuesday and muscles i thought atrophied sometime in 2007 have rejuvenated with a painful vengeance as i cannot walk or laugh without feeling sharp pains in parts of my body i'm sure i wasn't born with! It's true about no pain, no gain...to console my paining body i had a brownie [okay i had 3] but i'll work them off tomorrow.

Look at me, i'm a Taebo hoe and i'm loving it!

2 comments:

  1. Bwahahaha! The visuals in this one are very vivid. I swear I could see you fighting against those lipids! Kudos to you, though, T-Ho! :D

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